Thursday, March 27, 2014

A Beautiful Life with A Perfect Wife

Greetings from Sunny Florida!!!
And welcome to the last days of Spring Training before a brand new season is upon us.  Well, it's actually two new seasons because not only is a glorious new season of seasoned baseball players ready to play baseball, and I'm ready to watch them overpriced gents from a completely insanely uncomfortable plastic seat with my exquisite @PlayfulWifey by my side and an absurdly incredibly expensive beer in my hand, but also about that equally important new season that has also sprung from the depths of wintery blue balls to the promise land of a warm new world of carnal delights...

HotWife Season is HERE!!!

The chicken satay its stay too long and the eggnog question has expired and now I'm left with which comes first: the Hotwife or the Baseball season. 

Closely tied in standings, they seem.

The winters are miserably cold outside and very warm in our house at the same time which means there is lots of eating and fucking at home nights to be enjoyed; buttass in the spring, the Wifey's clothes seem less and less the more and more out into the warm hot public days/nights...and sweet cheese and brown rice does the Wifey have a wonderful body of nice to display for all I hope to enjoy.

Cum one! Cum all!! Cum thinking about my naked hotwife!!!
I know I got some on the wall!

This last winter wasn't all balls, well they weren't blue balls that's for sure.  The wifey and I aren't on here much, but we still get up to a bunch of no good from time to all the time and well to begin...

Unfortunately, if you read, and I hope you did, the Wifey's last post, her fantasy of me driving her to some businessman's office for him and her to get down on each other's business, I'm sad to write in my latest TPS report didn't happen, but the wife and I have stayed actively active in our search for the next playtoy for my Wifey to devour. 

Not sooo active that we have met any candidates but Wifey and I keep an AFF account open, except there's no accounting for some of the accounts on AFF.  Dudes can be weird, and they really aren't helping anyone's cause sometimes when they offer to rape, impregnate, or smoke meth with my Wifey.  Really, we appreciate these truly odd and sometimes illegal offers but we were looking to go in a different direction with sharing my wife with others.

Not all is rotten in the land of AFF and some guys have actually entertained my Wifey on more than one or more occasion with either some witty word exchanging stuff, some charming good looks, or with some good O'fashion whip/tug a big it out on webcam action. Let's just say, I've seen more than my fair share of peni recently and this may sound weird to say in a church bathroom, or not, but it turns me on like a lamp when Wifey gets all these guys to perform on webcam for her.  Every time she gets these strange men off, and they have that glassy "oh shit" look in their sleepy eyes afterwards, Wifey tells them good night and then off to bed the wife and I go to make sure the neighbor's still do not doubt who is the loudest sex noise house on the block.  

OH! the different dicks I've seen. Fun fact, the biggest one wasn't attached to a black gentleman but instead the meat monger lived in Italy so don't bet on Italy to win the World Cup this year with those extra pounds slowing them down (insert trumpet WahWah sound)

And just don't you think it's unfair or that maybe after all that cock, my mind now goes there...Wifey isn't all bats and balls, she is still very much the type of wifey who gets down for a lady show after a few rounds.  Eating, drinking, smoking, fucking, and drinking is pretty much the family crest on our front door, so when we go a few miles (kilometers) from that front door, the depravity only intensifies more.  We attack a foreign city like Vikings, or Godzilla, pillaging and plundering and leaving a big tip for the hotel staff know...hotel sex.

We usually break a new hotel room bed in immediately upon entering more than the room.  Let it know who's boss here until check-out time 11am.  The room's walls and the city streets are never the same after what they see and I'm proud to have found my fellow delinquent life partner whose enjoys the same drinking holes and the same titty poles as I do, and not just on my birthday dirty mind you, but I don't mind bragging about bagging the type of wifey who would rather go to a nudie club than a dancedance club any day including twice on Sundays and even on our Valentine Day weekend getaway.

Much like the AFF box of chocolate, you never know what you are getting into once you pay your couple's fee to enter a naked lady revue.  There are plenty of moody girls there acting like I'm the reason their fathers' left home, and once those DD's (Debbie Downer's) go away, it becomes really the best place to watch all kinds of people.  Sure there are naked ladies doing their naked lady thing, but if you look beyond all the butts and the sensory overload, there is just so much going on in that cool dark misty room.  Plenty of weird guys in groups or by themselves to observe what flavor of naked chick's calling gets them closer to the stage.  There's also plenty of naked girls of course looking for transactions of all levels, but sometimes if you aren't paying attention, they write their college papers in a dark booth or hang out together in groups to talk about me of I'm sure.  It's not a theme park in LA for everyone, but that's why they build theme parks in LA for everyone. 

Before you fully become conscience of there being no pictures or video of my Wifey in this post let me leave you with this truly pants constricting true story from on the road. 

I've seen a million sunsets, and I remember each one, but I will never forget the last evening of our return road trip home from one of our last licentious vacations.  I love my cat, although my wife is my favorite pet, and I love to pet my pet.  Usually as I drive, we will touch each other from time to time.  It's not like we don't spend enough time together, although I could always go for more if you know where I can get it. I love touching her all over her alluring body and NO PLACE has been safe from a touch, kiss, or lick so it probably wouldn't surprise anyone here with me on this page, that my hands started on Wifey's bare knee and then my fingers did some walking up thigh and um...there might have been some finger like lewd behavior on the freeway home that night as we passed by you all.

And not to leave you hanging...When we got home later that night, I went to work on things.

Friday, September 6, 2013

Hello all, Wifey here...
     Hubby and I have been busy tap, tap, tapping away on these little keys, late into the night lately. We have been on that site where grown ups bare their bits in order to make playful-dates. We have been hanging out in the chat rooms and have met many interesting characters. Last night we chatted with a fella who planted quite the fantasy in this naughty little Wifey's head.

     Our new friend, informed us that he has a big, fancy office in a nearby big, fancy city. He suggested that I come meet him for lunch or a drink someday soon. He said I should come meet him at his big, fancy office and my mind quickly flashed with where that would lead. It goes a little something like this...

     I pictured hubby dropping me off in the lobby of a very tall building. I would be wearing a tight, black, knee length skirt and button-down blouse. Hubby would kiss me as he departed to sit in a bar close by. I would walk clickety-clack in my black stilettos to a wall of elevators. As I ride up to the 33rd floor, I try to remain calm and remember to breathe. I head straight to the big, fancy office as directed. Luckily, his secretary is out to lunch so I don't even have to speak to anyone. I knock lightly on his door and he says, "come in". I take a deep breath and enter. He takes in every inch of me as I enter the room and his mouth parts a little. He quickly composes himself and begins to regard me as a client. I introduce myself and he smirks, relieved that I am not just a client. As I walk in and close the door, he stands from his desk that is near the floor to ceiling window. His office is enormous and overlooks an amazing view of the city. He is wearing a crisp white shirt and black tie. He is very handsome and I already know what he has in his pants because of his pictures from the website. He is very large and I can already tell he is getting excited. I walk toward him and we shake hands awkwardly. I turn to get an even better look of the view and am speechless. Without hesitation, takes his position behind me and wraps one arm around my waist, pulling me close to him. I can feel him growing hard as my ass is pressed to him. With his other hand he swiftly grasps a handful of my hair and tilts my head so that he can begin kissing my neck. As much as I love the view, I close my eyes in sheer pleasure. I use one hand to keep us steady against the window while my other hand reaches to feel exactly how hard and large he is getting. I gasp a little at just how big he feels and wonder if it may hurt me later. He makes quick work of unbuttoning my blouse and tossing it to the floor. He unzips my skirt and that soon joins my blouse on the floor. The entire city could now see me standing in my black bra and panties if they happened to look in the right window. He kisses behind my ear, down my neck and to my shoulder. He reaches into my bra to cup my breast and begins pinching and twisting my nipple. His other hand is moving up the back of my thigh. He uses one finger to trace a line from the front to the back of my panties, teasing me. He grabs a handful of my ass hard and I moan. He turns me around and picks me up. I wrap my legs around him as he carries me over to a couch in the corner of his office. He lays on top of me and begins to kiss me hard. I grab a fistful of his hair run my other hand down his back. At this point, I realize he is still wearing a shirt and can't have that. I begin to undo his tie and buttons. I slip his shirt off of him to reveal warm, soft, tan skin. He is in great shape. I run my hands across his muscular arms and back. I begin to remove his pants and he removes my bra. As he stands to fully remove his pants, he looks at me and takes a deep breath, his eyes sparkling with desire. He kneels on the couch in front of me and his extremely hard cock is gorgeous. I want to suck on it but can tell he is in charge so I stay put. He slowly spreads my legs apart and runs his hands down my inner thighs, resting them just at the edge of my panties. I squirm and moan to feel more, the pressure building to need to be fucked. I can see how hard he is for me and I want him...right now! He slowly and firmly brings both of his thumbs up to press on my sweet spot. He is pressing my panties into me and they are soaking wet. I lean into his fingers and arch my back. As I arch my back he grasps my panties and slowly slides them off my hips and down my thighs to reveal all of me. He spreads my legs once again and teases me with a finger from the top to the bottom one more time. He then grabs my hips and pulls me towards him. He takes one more look at me and then thrusts deep and hard into me. He pulls out and then enters me again deeper and harder. He reaches down to pull me up so that I am straddling him. I wrap my arms around his neck as he begins to thrust quicker and deeper. I was afraid he would be to big but I am pleased to find out that I am enjoying every inch of him. He fills me up and is stretching more than I have ever felt but I am so wet and ready for him that it feels mind-blowing. As I moan into his neck, he grabs my hips tightly and begins to cum. He is thrusting and I am grinding, we are both moaning and panting. He lets out a loud, teeth-clenching, groan and I gasp and throw my head back in ecstasy. He grasps a handful of my hair again and pulls me in to kiss me. As he pulls way from me he smirks again and says, "nice to meet you."

Friday, August 23, 2013

Summer is Heating Up

...and we are back.

I know, I know, we haven't been very good to you lately with almost no new feedings in such a long time, but I hope we may be on to something right meow and you may just want to pull up a comfy chair...

Wifey and I have been plugging a lot of holes this year on other people's boats, that's just kind of what we do, but at one point this summer it sort of just set in for the Wifey and I that we just aren't doing a lot for ourselves. Ever.

So Wifey and I, in addition to other things, have really gotten back into finding a male plaything for Wifey to play with, and I will say that the best decision so far, is this time, was to drop Adam from our booty call list.  Adam has had so many chances but even I know better to say he's had his last chance.

The here and now is that Wifey has been amazing this summer and has been so strong through a lot of "life" this year.  So when we start kicking around the idea of Wifey taking a lover, our bedroom heats up like a forest fire on dry clean bed sheets. 

I love, love, love when Wifey and I can't keep our hands off of each other and whenever we are looking for friends to play with for Wifey, it seems we become the horniest, the dirtiest, and the filthiest married couple alive. 

I should not want my wife more than I already do, and then she wears little white shorts and I want to tear her little ass apart with my tongue, but wait! Now add all the same looks of desire I see other men and women give my wife's ass (amongst all other parts of her snack-cake body) and I get so hard that it feels like my dick is going to rip off of my body.  And when Wifey releases my inner workings, I erupt with such intense force that nothing, nothing, could rehab me from this vampy Wifey addiction I most certainly have.

Now the best part of my life, that some of you must already know, is that it's best to have a Wifey like mine.  Like she may, just may, be even slightly, ever so slightly, more of a pervert than me.  That's it!  That's the fucking room full of gold for me!!!  I may never earn another peso in my life, but to find a best friend is rewarding enough and then that best friend agrees to marry you, because she likes you, is a fucking gift from the gods. It doesn't stop there friends, due to the fact that your best friend, who also is your wifey, is also into the same kinky shit that you're into too!

I'm surprised I don't burst with rainbows and unicorns, I'm so g.d. happy with my partner in life!!!

OK I've lost track thinking about my Wifey again, and I wanted to share more of her with you.  Like that she's on a dating site again and has seen A LOT of cock this summer.  Big ones, small ones, cloaked cocks, cocks with bling, etc. You get the tip. 

And, I get to sit next to my painfully sexy Wifey all night, while she chats with all sorts of strange men from literally all over the world.  I am the proud hubby of a Wifey that is desired by so many guys, and quite a few girls, that say all the things you can say to a Wifey on an adult chat room late late late at night.  My Wifey has made men with GIANT dicks cum from her dirty chats and sexy comments.  I have absolutely never gotten tired of hearing these attractive men gush in more ways than one over the pictures of my Wifey's big beautiful bottom, or those men who want to continue the knotting of Wifey with her binding corset on indeed.  She's made me laugh till my head looked more like a red tomato than a brown hubby head, after she told a man, without missing a beat, that his 7" COCK was...small.  Don't feel bad for him, he liked her verbal spankings.  Just as I liked wife's steamy descriptions of what she'd do for a pent up gent in a penthouse.  Let's say I was more than aroused with her IMing bj dialogue and I went full sextard immediately when she told him that she wanted to find a seat really near him and his two handed monster friend too. TEEhee

I love hearing how these men talk to my Wifey, but I get way more aroused by her responses to them, and I get even more turned on when Wifey enjoys the reactions she is getting from me.  In fact when Wifey told me that she liked me watching her sexchat other men, I really was ready for the good lord to take me cause I had tasted my heaven and I never wanted to leave the dining room.

Instead Wifey and my behavior on the internet with others makes me hustle her to the bedroom and bend her over the side of the bed. 
With her sexy legs hanging/standing near the side of the bed, I pull her skirt up and press myself down on her half naked body. 
I stretch both of her long tan arms to the other side of the bed as she is now fully facedown with her fully naked thighs and ass in front of me.
I stroke my vulnerable Wifey as she doesn't resist my hands moving from her perfect bare lower back, then over her supple rear, and down the outside of those full of creamy thighs. 
Seeing how relaxed Wifey looks with her long eyelashes huddled together, and the brilliance of her shiny ring on her very married finger, I try to calm myself from getting too excited. 
Excitement is rushing over me thinking about her recent "internet friend" that wants to take her out on a date with or without me but most probably without me and this drives my fingertips up the inside of my Wifey's thighs as she lays ready for me, or him, to continue this sensual massage. 
Since he isn't here, but knowing his desire is still out there somewhere for my Wifey, I reach the warmest and moistest place I've ever been before, I swear. 
I feel over all that wonderful area as the gentle touching turns to slight tugging and nudging into that responding spot. 
I can hear that area respond and my cock must have heard it too because he then on takes charge of manimal like desires. 
My hands are no longer mine and I'm left to watch as some part much closer to the scene is now in control of my body. 
Even though they are still clothed my balls want to feel the back of her ass and thighs, I can't resist their urges any longer. 
My arms reach up from her ends and then with palms opened, down comes two simultaneous slaps that are more than welcomed from her body's response. 
I can't believe how amazing this looks, feels, and sounds. 
The pinkish look of her fleshy ass after being swatted, and the feeling of controlling her delicate body in my hands over her shoulders, ribs, and back as they held her into the bedding, or the sexy sounds of her wetness being exposed as I pull and separate her pleasures gently apart.


Monday, July 22, 2013

MidYear ButtDate

2013 is half way over
2014 is half way here
I wish I had more to share with you
I am loving being still
Dear readers,
Please excuse our disappearance, or yours, on whatever, or whomever, that has gotten in the way of me loving on my wifey, all day, everyday, but until our sexy slothfulness, pays the bills here, or...there are times when wifey or myself or all three of us are going going to be gone from home sweet home.
Now if you want to know about those boring workity worktimes,
then please read the phone book or your medic alert shirt, 
but if you and I want to get to
the nit-titty,
that makes me
I too, 
want to share with you,
and you,
and you
about how my wifey is on an online dating site
and tho before you say ho!,
wifey has not accepted one,
or any
of her many
indecent proposals.
I wish,
that wish,
that we once talked about,
that my sweet wifey,
my only ever wifey,
would give me,
and only me,
my watchful wish... 


Saturday, May 11, 2013

Is This Thing Still On?

Once upon a time...there actually was a beginning to this story of Adam.  No, really, there was. 

I was there...

...when my wifey began flirting with another man, soon to be called Adam, on an early internet dating site before internet dating sites turned into either a cyberspace regal beagle for Christians to Mingle or a fairly current and accurate sexual predator's list of freaks who live really really really too close for comfort to me and you. 
(2 - 80's tv references)

...when my wifey began some of the hottest kissing I've ever seen outside of an Arkansas rural summer family reunion, then my girl started heavy petting and light clawing of Adam's chest and arms as she sat in his swelling lap making out, then she was removing Adam's and her clothes, her hands were grabbing where his underwear creatures live, next her already warmed up mouth was kissing, licking, and sucking all those swollen new friends she just met until Adam roared the loudest roar while he erupted in joy and happiness from all the wonderful things my lady's sweet mouth was doing to him, right in front of me, as I drank a coke.

...when my wifey began to, after a five year break, secretly email dirty letter after dirtier letter to her penpal Adam, who seemingly without much hesitation wrote back to my perfect dirty wifey all sorts of things he would like to do to, and in certain specific locations on, her body.  The best part of this part was I had no part in this part of their illicit playing around relationship, as naive I studied for college finals/ate my weight in Chipotle everyone of those Stary Cuckold Nights.

...when my wifey began the reuniting process with her now slightly older friend with oral benefits but still just as fit as shit as he gave my wifey it, meantime, I sat in my corner like The Ultimate Happiests Perverted Husband Of All Time watching my wife work over this genitalman with her Super-Power Suave-Tongue and Moist-Mouth abilities capable to complete her mission in almost record bj time and seeing Adam's pent-up enjoyment of my wife's oral gifts is still one of my favorite "me at my most perverted" memories.

...when my wifey began texting dirty ponderings to her now sexy forty something old friend, and Adam, with his still-got-it-up nudie pics, texted some great ideas to my wifey.  This inspired me to try to give wifey Orgasm after Orgasm while also trying myself to not having any Orgasm, before any Orgasms, until my wife's mantoy, Adam, had rounded all the bases and scored a pull-up touchdown with my stunning wife, in her springtime fun blouse, lil black shorty shorts, and those long, long, the things we all could do with, legs that bring eyes down to study the stands that make up my alluring wife.

...when my wifey began with a hug in the parking lot of something with curbside appeal and takeout dining options, then it was a soda pop that fizzled to a stranded in an elevator chitchat that slowly led to a quick tip slip in the buck for their $6 lack of grown-up checkmate?, to finally an awkward woodpecker kiss with a lower back rub like they give in the mall...well, I wasn't there to watch that mess of a perfectly good hotwife/cuckold sexperience but I heard all about it.  Of course, I may have been a bit Hemingway drunk and your momma disappointed by the time wifey told me all about not getting it, so please forgive me as I may have been too premature with an impaired people's court judgement of you're fired off temptation island Adam!
Til next season?

...when my wifey said she had a sexy dream about Adam last week, though I instantly later no longer remember anything she said after that glorious announcement, because as I, and my wifey, and her Adam, and probably every reader who has read that last word now knows, Adam is what he is, and that is a pretty good fuckbuddy option for my wifey because he even makes his cons work!  Some.  How?

The Manly Pros and Many Cons of Adam:

As manly as an 'uncomfortable for everyone' cuckold statement can be about another man, I can say with watchful confidence that my wifey has found a handsome playmate to play mate with in her friend Adam. 

He is Athletically Taller than...
More Movie Star Tan than...
Way More 'Lifts-Heavier-Things' Muscular than...
And By A Tip > has a slightly bigger meat department in his grocery store than...

...My wife's hubby who loves the idea of his gorgeous wife spending some 'messing around time' with this Adam character so that he can use that athletically taller frame to physically engulf my darling wife's petite body to bring out new pleasures for her to experience, so that he can charm her with his movie star tan as they shower the fun off each other's bodies, so that after the shower my wife can towel dry every part of his athletic muscular tan body, and while all this and more is going on, one of the biggest manly pros of Adam is that he has always been a gentleman around my wife and I, and that it has been in some compromising positions is huge!

As non-bitchy a cuckold statement can be about another man, whom you know your wife likes to play with because she has in a lot of sultry ways told all 5 of my senses such, I can say that even Adam's faults line up with what we are looking for in a friend with wifey benefits. Wifey and I both know that although Adam is rich, good-looking, and very able-bodied, she isn't going to move to Dullsville with Adam anytime ever, and though Adam isn't much of a talker to talk to, Adam does seem to have the body of work to make my wifey into a purring...horny...pervy...ball and chain reaction that no cuckold hubby could be ready to handle on his own. "HELP!"

Adam does have one major very serious physical flaw, and as any size queen could attest, if a wife is going to fuck men other than her husband with that hubby's full permission, then that other penis better be bigger, better, and stronger than what the wife already has laying about at home.  Although Adam is a bit bigger, to one Queen of Size, it is the exact size and shape of her soulmate, thus cue sad trombone music as the people cry. 

What is undetermined so far is better and stronger, but to review what is already known, fit Adam doesn't drink or smoke, so makes me compute that Adam would make a nice jumping up and down starting point to get off to before the wife takes on bigger and better things like say Patrick Willis of the SF 49ers.

But What About The Sexy Wifey Dream?

Damn it! I told you I don't remember if she even told me or if I seized up in the memory and a couple of other departments because this was some of the best news I've heard in awhile.  SO if I fucking forgot the dream, then I'm sorry...

...and then she read that last part and said, "You really don't remember?" so she told me the dream again, and it was a good dream, but then I went to write it later...

...and I forgot again...

...but I'm sure that if someone asks nicely, wifey may share her sexy Adam dream with us all so I...

...what were we talking about?

Sunday, January 20, 2013

HoHoHummer and What I Hope Is Sex

To Our Readers,

I've read a lot of mularky about how blogs are dead, and end of blogdays are nigh.  I do not like the sounds of that as I have always loved our time with each other, eventhough I will admit to not blogging a lot lately.  Sorry. 

I hope that not only will I recomitt myself to blogging more in 2013 but also I hope to pester Playfulwifey to blog more often too.

And even MOST importante...


A Very XXXmas Xmas 2012

Before we get to today, I would like to sum up last year a tittybit then we can move on to an already interesting 2013.  2012 was a great year for the wife and I.  I really felt like we are getting more and more comfortable with our adult selves.  We've been together for my own forever and I wouldn't trade one second of a minute with my badass wife, especially 2012; it was the tits! 

Sure you know everything about wifey's date with Adam, and our other 2012 adventures, but the rearending of 2012 is inspiring for an exciting 2013 to cum
(Wifey hates that pun or should I say cun?). 

What Dirty SantaWifey brought me...

1.  The best gift was without a doubt a hardcover picturebook of our dirty pictures we took at a fancypantsy hotel in the city a couple of years ago.  We've put a couple of these pictures on our twitter accounts, but it was very nice of SantaWifey to put all of those seen and unseen pictures into one of the TopShelf XXXmas Gift's of All-Time! (I Hope the good folks at ShutterFly enjoyed our art book)

2.  SantaWifey didn't stop there dear readers. Nope. There was Tres XXX MAS! Like a Jenga-Style sex game that was voted best sex game of 2011.  I look forward to publishing my review in a soon future post.

3.  Also a Very Interesting Gift of a How-To-Tie-Knots Handbook with Ropes included Giftbox.  I was once a BoyScout and liked to play with knots so maybe wifey remembered me telling her a story about my old days or maybe wifey was more hinting towards her more recent interest in a little of the BDSM thing.  I look forward to publishing my review in a soon future post.

4.  Lastly, almost in an apologetic manner, wifey handed me another How to Handbook, but its tone was more of a serious nature.  It seems my lack of skills at orallingusing the wifey has reached a different level, but I wasn't ashamed of my gift from wifey.  I have earned my ScarletLetter of P for my legendarily epic inabilities at eating Pie...wifeypie that is.  The best pie.  It's not that I'm not interested, I would spend the rest of my life licking my wife, but I'm lost in the translation from desire to action to positive reactions.  I hope to post my learning is progressing, otherwise who knows...maybe wifey will have to seek outside support.  That would be terrible (Sarcasm Implied).

What Dirty SantaHubby brought wifey...

1.  I guess last year was a record Orgasm year for wifey, I'm pretty sure it was, because it seems wifey had to bury PocketRocket#4 in the backyard last November.  The "Hubby's Little Helper" died in the line of duty one night right in the middle of a wifeygasm covered operation.  He served Her Majesty with all his might but it happens to all of us.  So SantaHubby got wifey a topgear new Holiday Edition PocketRocket#5.

2.  Speaking of New Toys...SantaHubby over did himself and probably pulled everything in his underwear lifting this G.D. gift, but wifey got a Shane Diesel 10" realistic Dong.  This thing is massive and makes my own shaft more of a shhht.  Wifey's previous toy, BigRick, is 8" and made me feel inadequte enough when I used the bathroom, so I can't wait for Shane's Toy's Sexeffect on my lovely wifey.  On a perverted sidenote, it was kinda cool that @shanedieselxxx himself thanked me for giving his lifelike penis to my wifey for XXXmas. I know, SexGeek

3.  Speaking of Shane Diesel...SantaHubby was most generous with pornography for wifey this year.  She hasn't had time yet but on her pornque is an:
  • InterActive WonderWoman Porno (Cuz Wifey is my EnterActive Sexy WonderWoman)
  • A 50 Shades Porno (Cuz Wifey gave two Nips up to the book threesome, like ever other dirty woman out there with a heater in her panties did)
  • A Richard Mann XXX Hotwife Porno (Cuz the 12" Penis Himself Follows my @PlayfulWifey on Twitter)
  • A Shane Diesel Cuckold Movie (Cuz wouldn't it be nice to roleplay a few scenes from that movie with a certain you know what, 10" toy, and a certain you know who, wifey,?).
On another perverted sidenote, one of these days I'm going to get drunk enough to post a "my real dick" comparison to "Shane Diesel's unbelieveable dicktoy" picture on twitter. (Why not, wifey's naked ass is on twitter and my BoyScout career is over).

4.  Speaking of large toys...SantaHubby also got my gorgeous wifey some other brand SPANKING new toys.  Wifey received the whipping end of a very jenky Cat-O-9 Tails' whip that was bullshit (Thanks Health and Beauty Department), butt only better was the 27" Riding Crop (Thanks Health and Beauty Department).

The 27" Riding Crop Hummer

What started as any other evening where I walked by wifey in the dinning room was turned into a once in a lifetime opportunity to receive a lights on blow job in the bedroom.  I really don't remember if we were drunk (likely) or if we were just bored (also likely) but out of nowhere wifey offered me my 1st BJ of 2013. And I took my tongue lashing like a man!

So there I was sitting naked on our marital bed from the waist down looking down at my cock while wifey returned naked from the livingroom with a couch pillow to kneel on; so she could welcome in the new year for me in comfort.  I remember being shocked how thick and happy my el presidente looked while he waited for the cabinet meating to cummence.  Usually, he has a "Not-So-Much" look at best, but this night he hung down over my swollen balls in a way I had never seen him behave before.  I suppose the lucky guy knew who/what was cumming for him. 

I don't though remember how I came into possession of the 27" Riding Crop butt it did come in handy very quickly once the bobbing began.

Before I spank out of hand...I can not to this day, after more than 15 years, think of anything more peaceful, relaxing, and amazing than my wifey's oral ninja skills on my thirdeyeblind and even better was watching her perform her best oral skills on Adam, Twice!.  Whereas I'm a complete putz with vagina in or near my mouth, the wifey is the Saint of Knocking My Wood Down to Size with her sweet warm special kiss.

Moving forward...Wifey began doing her thing with my thing and it arose like the mighty redwoods, though quicker and with more of a pinkish hue.  I remember asking her to stick her bottom out during her passionate performance, as she kneeled in front of me, and to my surprise she did just that.  Surprising myself, I dom-upped for a moment and started spanking her creamy white rear with the riding crop.  At first, I just lightly tapped her other side of the world, butt then I jumped on a mushroom or something because I DOM-UPPED even more as I pulled the crop back further and let the swats get harder and on that beautiful ass I married. 

I don't know what came over me, but I was enjoying the power of turning that crop lose on my loving wife's defenseless hind as I held the back of her head down on my now emmensely swollen other manhead.  Every time I spanked her she moaned, every time I spanked her harder she moaned louder, and every time she released her muffled moans louder it became harder and harder for me to hold back my own pleasure release.  Like a good LORD of ASS I was, because I was kind to the two fields, of now reddish lands, and began to pet the tingly areas with the crophead that had just weathered the assualt of the horsey tool of obedience.  I especially enjoyed sending the head of that crop along with the stick up and down the length of the separation of those two now tender fields.  Down the path past the Well of Intense Tight Pleasures, over the Sensitive BorderLand, to those Gates before the Cave of Warm Womanly Delights.

I held my ground troops back as long as I could the wood, but in the end, I was no match for the mouthy indulgences of my wifey.  She is the best wifey and I hope to have and to serve her always.

Ok...I haven't even told you yet what made that bj one of the best, if not the best of my life.  When wifey had finished me and even more, she stood up, took my hand in her own hand, and slid it up her beautifully cool to the touch snow white thighs, so I could feel her own excitement from giving me a top of the world head session.  Take it from me, that kicked some ass, feeling her excitement from giving me pleasure as it ran down her succulent legs.  FUCK I LOVE MY WIFE!

What I Hope Is Sex For 2013

I will miss 2012 and all the adventures the wifey and I had together.  Eventhough Adampoloza wasn't all it was Poloza to be, the build up to their date was intensely worth the dud the date turned out to be.  I'm ruined from a certain nearby mall because all I do once I'm there is talk about my wifey's date with Adam like it was my Vietnam. 

I can tell you it was still fun to sit outside on a beautiful summer afternoon in the car with the windows down and the radio up while wifey was in getting her nails done for her date that was later that day.  I can also tell you I don't think I've ever been able to get as hard without any physical stimulation, with just my wifey talking about what she hoped Adam would do to her.  I hope those and the many other positive 2012 sexperiences will lead to more and more fun, and just for fun, here are my:

TOP Five HOPEful Sexperiences For 2013

5.  Lap Dance For Wifey

       This was discussed for my last Birthday, but logistically didn't work out.  The plan is for the amazing wifey and I to go to a stripclub.  From there, the wifey shall choose a dancer who pleases the wifey.  The dancer then will be commanded to dance nakedly all over my wifey in a private booth.  The best part, is I get to watch the hell out of the dance production!

4.  Girls Night Out

        This has been one of my favorite ideas for awhile but again logistics and a somewhat vanilla extract has thwarted previous attempts.  The plan is for the gorgeous wifey to go out with some "wilder" type, but vanillalike, friends from college.  She hasn't seen them for awhile and they live a few million inches away, but I'm hoping to find a way to get the wifey and her friends back together for a night out in the city.  The wifey hasn't had any recent ladies' nights and she is due.  I really don't expect the wifey to fuck some strange penis in a Denny's parking lot, but it would be a lot of fun for yours truly to hear some new stories from the wifey college days.

3.  Hear No Evil

        This has been a lil something I've been kicking around in my delapidated headspace for a while now.  The plan is a bit expensive so it may take a good part of the year, but I've always wanted to fix up the spare room as a Hubby OverNight Room.  Basically, it would work like this, wifey would meet a large muscled and tall black gentleman with big hands and an even bigger schlong!  Maybe we have dinner together at the house, as a threesome, before wifey and her guest twosome to our bedroom for the night.  Leaving me with nothing to do but sleep in the Hubby room on the futon while the incredible sounds of unknown pleasures fill the house that I have to all to myself.

2.  See No Evil

        This is something that would probably not work for my wifey.  Due to years of working retail she no longer enjoys erotic experiences where she is wearing a blindfold.  But the plan I have is to put a sleepy blinder on my wifey and then open the hotel room for her serviceman friend we just met down in the bar.  At the bar, the wifey and I would meet this gentleman by accident and strike up a conversation.  Drinks and maybe some Tom Foollery under the table lead to wifey propositioning our active military hero friend that we just began telling dirty stories to.  Maybe our stories make wifey blush and GI Joe's sexy stories arouse things under wifey's clothes but sooner or later an offer is offered and accepted to have the married couple entertain the soldier of fortune in our hotel room.  Wifey would be nervous about being alone with a stranger but still not want me watching her, so with a moment of brillance from our officer and a gentleman, a sleep mask is purchased from Wal-Greens.  Wifey will get the reassurance that she is safe with a stranger while her husband is nearby and all the while the mask allows the wifey to fool herself to not knowing who is watching and who is doing more than watching to her.

1.  Tweet No Evil

        This is what the Adam should have been but even better because it includes twitter and everybody knows I love twitter.  The new and improved plan is a bit wild but who knows.  The wild is all around us sometimes.
True story, I came home the other day from work and wifey was telling me about one of her newer followers on twitter.  He is an older man and with easily more money than I will ever achieve.  This man tends to dote and spend money on certain hotwives that tickle his fancy.  The wifey and I have always had a perverted fantasy of her getting a sugar daddy who will give my wifey lots of gifts for her "attention" to certain details that are important to the sugardaddy.  I love the idea of some fancy pants fellow who isn't looking for a wife, but just a woman to wine, dine, and certainly sexualize.  I would not only seek this for my wifey, but when wifey started to tell me about the new follower, I was almost jumping out of my sweatpants in delusions of wifey was now in his sites for cash payments.  Who knows maybe someday wifey will get that daddy and I would love to sit on my cuckoldcouch at home and tweet my random thoughts while my wifey was twitting away while on a weekend date in some playland with her wealthy admirer who was also describing his sexperiences he was currently exploring with my willing wifey.  As long as he returns her as close to the way as I lent her to him, maybe even a little wetter than before, then Hell Yes Please Seduce My Wifey!

But if he didn't return her, and decided to keep her for himself, then I can assure this scoundrel that Liam Neeson will be playing me in the big screen adaption of what a horribly silly mess I made of the filthy lothario!


Thursday, November 1, 2012

Adam & PlayfulWifey 3: After, Day After, More After, And Now

Hello our Lil'Personal-Sized Perverts and of course all of our Full-On-Figured Freaks,
It's been awhile but we still love you all equally so I wanted to just finish cleaning up around here and give you the what is what and now and new.

After the Date...

(To really explain my reaction to after the date, please allow me to reintroduce myself during my wife's date with Adam)

I must admit whilst my sweet and ever sexy playfulwifey was next door dating another man, I was left alone with 2 + Too Attentive = 4way intoxicating bartenders who seemed just as concerned about my levels of dehydration as I was with seeing double, so I may have had a few too many MANly pints.  My excuse that it was a summer afternoon with a Yankee v. Indians game on and a new New York Times to read is legit, but to the bartenders I probably just looked like an old unemployed hobo with an anxious disposition and no evident ability to small talk. 

My mind was elsewhere that beautiful afternoon, so while it was away with the wifey, whoever was left in charge let the scene lead to a few couple lot of beers and once wifey picked me up after her date and caught me up to after the date, I became the result of a grumpy bad attitude only displayed in very young children, middle aged men, and dying zebras.  Adam had yet again let down Kink Team Sex by not taking more charge of his date with my wife.  Christ, from what I heard it was like an awkward latenight episode of Sportscenter, with Adam and my wifey talking more baseball and football, than "suck my balls then rub one out on my foot."  Not the expected outcome of spending the last of my youth shopping for the damn outfit that Adam apparently ignored while playing the Wide World of Sportsmanship with my wifey who was game for something else on the menu at Applebees that afternoon.

So...Wifey and I drove to sushi and drowned our blue bull sorrows with Japanesse Beers.  Yorokobi! some Asahi 
Then...Wifey and I drove home and dropped our drawers with in seconds of being with in our sexroom. YAY! a lay
Next...Wifey and I dove undercover and played cowboys and robbers. She was a Yankee cop and I was a Cleveland Indian. You're OUT! of order
Finally...Wifey and I done it with her vibrating rocketship that sent her O-biting my shoulder while I skeetered with my 0.1524 metered peter.  3 Times! 4 Hubby

Day after the day...

Feeling shitty about the date with Adam, both Wifey and I needed to think about what the fuck just happened and what to do next with him.  So what do you do after you have a confusing affair that went nowhere, well if you were we, you'd also go away to get away, and of course to play in your own special way.

After the date, Playfulwifey felt horrible about how the "it" went.  She took way too much blame for Adam's lack of game and since I wasn't around to see what went down, I didn't know what to say to her or about the date.  I was confused, frustrated, and probably hungover.  I could tell that there was a part of my wifey that really still wanted to play with Adam and this was hard for both of us to deal with and what to do next and if there was to even be a next.  Adam was still very interested in my wifey, as though in his head the date went great, and though Playfulwifey was disappointed in Adam's "bore a date to sex my mate" approach, wifey found herself "tempted" by that very brief kiss they had at the end of their date.

So...just like when Charleton Heston went up a hill with a robe and came down with a text message on some paper made of rock, Playfulwifey and I were led by something tingly under our robes to go down to the pornstore for new supplies to aid between our thighs.

8 inch WifeSaber: $90
6 speed Vibrating-Wife/Happy-Life Toy: $50
4 hour Underground Parking Spot in the Middle of a Major Metropolitan City: $30
Playfulwifey Taking You to Your Overpriced Underground Parking Spot and Letting You Work Her Over with Her New BuzzingToy While Really Fucking Old People Take Their Sweet OblivAss Time to Get the Fuck Away from You While Playfulwifey Orgasms While You Are Also LookOut for More Old Fucking Blue-Haired ToyCockBlockers:  Priceless

More After the Day than I Care to Remeber...

This is the part I hated the most because I didn't do anything.  Wifey was tempted and ready to plan a hotel stay to play with Adam and his ideas of all sort of naughty things he wanted to do to my wife eventhough he was unable to demostrate these ideas in verbal and/or nonverbal cues during his date with my wife.  I choked.  I should have just nutted up right there and gave wifey my credit card and loaded on the computer myself, but instead I played our favorite game at our house, THE DINNER GAME.  This game sucks and sucks and then sucks some more and no matter how strong of mind you think you are you will never ever out think your oppenent because you're your only oppenent in THE DINNER GAME.

Dinner Game:
2 or more players; preferably married

1st player:  What do you want for dinner? (Have a great idea in mind already)
2nd player:  I don't know. (Clearly knows)
1st player:  What sounds good to you? (Wait for other player to guess idea)
2nd player:  I don't know. (Clearly knows)
1st player:   ...                   (...)
2nd player:  What sounds good to you? (Clearly knows)
1st player:   ...                   (...)
2nd player:  ...                   (...)

Game continues til the last person that starves is declared "the winner" by EMT. 

And Now...

It's been three months since Playfulwifey and Adam have written and I really don't know anymore than I did three minutes after the date.  Wifey and I talk about Adam once in awhile but usually it's a random comment and it never goes anywhere.  Adam hasn't written or contacted wifey or I as either a way of being respectful of our relationship or as a signal of a major mental handicap that was earlier thought only to be politeness.

The End

Butt it's not the end yet I think.  In fact, it may be the end of Adam, may, but my wifey is still pursued by other men and they have been way more interesting in their pursuits than Adam has been to date.  Get date...Adam.

to be or not to be continued...