Saturday, May 11, 2013

Is This Thing Still On?

Once upon a time...there actually was a beginning to this story of Adam.  No, really, there was. 

I was there...

...when my wifey began flirting with another man, soon to be called Adam, on an early internet dating site before internet dating sites turned into either a cyberspace regal beagle for Christians to Mingle or a fairly current and accurate sexual predator's list of freaks who live really really really too close for comfort to me and you. 
(2 - 80's tv references)

...when my wifey began some of the hottest kissing I've ever seen outside of an Arkansas rural summer family reunion, then my girl started heavy petting and light clawing of Adam's chest and arms as she sat in his swelling lap making out, then she was removing Adam's and her clothes, her hands were grabbing where his underwear creatures live, next her already warmed up mouth was kissing, licking, and sucking all those swollen new friends she just met until Adam roared the loudest roar while he erupted in joy and happiness from all the wonderful things my lady's sweet mouth was doing to him, right in front of me, as I drank a coke.

...when my wifey began to, after a five year break, secretly email dirty letter after dirtier letter to her penpal Adam, who seemingly without much hesitation wrote back to my perfect dirty wifey all sorts of things he would like to do to, and in certain specific locations on, her body.  The best part of this part was I had no part in this part of their illicit playing around relationship, as naive I studied for college finals/ate my weight in Chipotle everyone of those Stary Cuckold Nights.

...when my wifey began the reuniting process with her now slightly older friend with oral benefits but still just as fit as shit as he gave my wifey it, meantime, I sat in my corner like The Ultimate Happiests Perverted Husband Of All Time watching my wife work over this genitalman with her Super-Power Suave-Tongue and Moist-Mouth abilities capable to complete her mission in almost record bj time and seeing Adam's pent-up enjoyment of my wife's oral gifts is still one of my favorite "me at my most perverted" memories.

...when my wifey began texting dirty ponderings to her now sexy forty something old friend, and Adam, with his still-got-it-up nudie pics, texted some great ideas to my wifey.  This inspired me to try to give wifey Orgasm after Orgasm while also trying myself to not having any Orgasm, before any Orgasms, until my wife's mantoy, Adam, had rounded all the bases and scored a pull-up touchdown with my stunning wife, in her springtime fun blouse, lil black shorty shorts, and those long, long, the things we all could do with, legs that bring eyes down to study the stands that make up my alluring wife.

...when my wifey began with a hug in the parking lot of something with curbside appeal and takeout dining options, then it was a soda pop that fizzled to a stranded in an elevator chitchat that slowly led to a quick tip slip in the buck for their $6 lack of grown-up checkmate?, to finally an awkward woodpecker kiss with a lower back rub like they give in the mall...well, I wasn't there to watch that mess of a perfectly good hotwife/cuckold sexperience but I heard all about it.  Of course, I may have been a bit Hemingway drunk and your momma disappointed by the time wifey told me all about not getting it, so please forgive me as I may have been too premature with an impaired people's court judgement of you're fired off temptation island Adam!
Til next season?

...when my wifey said she had a sexy dream about Adam last week, though I instantly later no longer remember anything she said after that glorious announcement, because as I, and my wifey, and her Adam, and probably every reader who has read that last word now knows, Adam is what he is, and that is a pretty good fuckbuddy option for my wifey because he even makes his cons work!  Some.  How?

The Manly Pros and Many Cons of Adam:

As manly as an 'uncomfortable for everyone' cuckold statement can be about another man, I can say with watchful confidence that my wifey has found a handsome playmate to play mate with in her friend Adam. 

He is Athletically Taller than...
More Movie Star Tan than...
Way More 'Lifts-Heavier-Things' Muscular than...
And By A Tip > has a slightly bigger meat department in his grocery store than...

...My wife's hubby who loves the idea of his gorgeous wife spending some 'messing around time' with this Adam character so that he can use that athletically taller frame to physically engulf my darling wife's petite body to bring out new pleasures for her to experience, so that he can charm her with his movie star tan as they shower the fun off each other's bodies, so that after the shower my wife can towel dry every part of his athletic muscular tan body, and while all this and more is going on, one of the biggest manly pros of Adam is that he has always been a gentleman around my wife and I, and that it has been in some compromising positions is huge!

As non-bitchy a cuckold statement can be about another man, whom you know your wife likes to play with because she has in a lot of sultry ways told all 5 of my senses such, I can say that even Adam's faults line up with what we are looking for in a friend with wifey benefits. Wifey and I both know that although Adam is rich, good-looking, and very able-bodied, she isn't going to move to Dullsville with Adam anytime ever, and though Adam isn't much of a talker to talk to, Adam does seem to have the body of work to make my wifey into a purring...horny...pervy...ball and chain reaction that no cuckold hubby could be ready to handle on his own. "HELP!"

Adam does have one major very serious physical flaw, and as any size queen could attest, if a wife is going to fuck men other than her husband with that hubby's full permission, then that other penis better be bigger, better, and stronger than what the wife already has laying about at home.  Although Adam is a bit bigger, to one Queen of Size, it is the exact size and shape of her soulmate, thus cue sad trombone music as the people cry. 

What is undetermined so far is better and stronger, but to review what is already known, fit Adam doesn't drink or smoke, so makes me compute that Adam would make a nice jumping up and down starting point to get off to before the wife takes on bigger and better things like say Patrick Willis of the SF 49ers.

But What About The Sexy Wifey Dream?

Damn it! I told you I don't remember if she even told me or if I seized up in the memory and a couple of other departments because this was some of the best news I've heard in awhile.  SO if I fucking forgot the dream, then I'm sorry...

...and then she read that last part and said, "You really don't remember?" so she told me the dream again, and it was a good dream, but then I went to write it later...

...and I forgot again...

...but I'm sure that if someone asks nicely, wifey may share her sexy Adam dream with us all so I...

...what were we talking about?